Watching from far away and dreaming of times gone by,
You seemed to know everything so answer my question why?
Why when I tried did you always put me down,
Why when I looked did you always wear the crown.

And when I finally won, when I held my head up high,
Why when I looked did you make me want to cry?

Well this page is probably the strangest of the lot, it's not to explain things, but rather to point them out. Come to your own conclusions. There are several things I want to put down here, and if you think of anything that should have a place here then please e-mail me with your ideas and I'll see what I can do.

And now to begin...

Time

What better to start with, after all it's what this page is really all about, time and it's limits. OK, well time is not as simple as you maybe think it is, it's actually very complicated and to be completely truthful I have no idea of the actual concept of time. Time comes and time goes, the only thing that tells us that it was ever there are memories of things that happened. The fact that we are always thinking behind time is an awkward thing, you see if you ever think of something then it's already gone. Imagine the second that is currently happening, by the time your reading this bit that second is long gone.

God

God, who is this God bloke, he's supposed to be the best thing in the entire universe, he's supposed to be so good isn't he. Well that's not what I call it. Evil is more like it it, how could anyone be good and come up with such a horrible thing like death or even for that matter life. I mean we get born and all we look forward to all our lives is dying, thank god(!) it's a suprise!

Good / Bad

The concept of good and bad are taken from the word of God, but how can you really tell if something is good or not? What exactly makes something or someone good? Below is a short story which explains my point exactly...

Picture the scene. Young man leaves for work one morning, same as any other, kisses his wife goodbye on the doorstep of their detached house on the outskirts of some large city and begins his 10 minute walk to work where he is expecting yet another bonus and possibly and other promotion. This time next year he hopes to become a partner in the small law firm.

However, today as he walked to work alongside the busy road that runs through the middle of the estate he sees a man, of no more than 25 years of age, begin to cross the road. As he watches he sees the transit van turn the corner and accelerate towards the man, on a direct course to hit him. The young lawyer moves quickly running across the road and pushing the young man out of the way of the oncoming van, only to be hit himself, he dies slowly in a pool of blood on the road with the dim sound of sirens in his years.

When his eyes open all he can see is a bright white light, as his eyes grow used to the light he makes out the face of an old man standing above him. His white beard is barely two inches from his face. The young lawyer asks the first question that comes into his head. "Am I dead?" he asks, the old man turns away and gives a very simple answer, "Yes". The old man helps the lawyer up and walks with him along a pathway to a gate and then turns back and leaves him.

The gates open and another man with a scroll walks out, "I am the gate keeper to the doors of eternity. You have come before me to plead for you place. What have you to say?". "I have lived only a short part of my life, but what I have lived I have done my best with, I have done everything I could in the time I had." The young lawyer says. The gate keeper finally lowers his eyes to meet that of the lawyers, all the lawyer could make out in those eyes is pity. "You have lived all of your life, your time is finished." the gate keeper says "Your passage to eternity is denied, you will be no more". "Wait," screams the lawyer "what have I done so wrong?". The gate keeper looks at the lawyer for only a moment "The deaths of 14 people are on your soul, that is too much for one man to bear."

"What deaths, I have never killed!" The gate keeper only looks at the lawyer then turns and closes the gates slowly behind him, the man you died saving was what you would call a mass murderer, after you saved his life he went on and killed 12 more before he was finally caught and killed." The lawyer was shocked, "How was I to know, I thought I was doing good, I thought I was doing the right thing." The gate keeper was now beginning to walk away "Wait" says the lawyer again "it wasn't my fault, I didn't murder those people, I never murdered anyone." "In the eyes of the God you did commit murder," the gate keeper replies "you killed yourself. You were trusted with this soul and you ruined it in one moment of stupidity, this cannot be tolerated. Suicide is not tolerated here." The gate keeper was almost lost in the bright light now, not that the lawyer could see anymore tears had filled his eyes his sight was blurred and blind over ten foot. "I wasn't to know, how could I know?" he cried "I didn't mean it, it was an accident. Please, let me enter, please!!". The gate keeper turned around for the final time, "You might be wondering who the final person was, well she now stands behind you, she was also unworthy to enter." The lawyer turned around and looked at his late wife, he could see the bruising around her neck, bruising and rope burns. "Suicide will not be tolerated" the gate master repeated as he turned away and walked into the light.

 I think that makes my point.

Take me to the highest hill,
And throw me from the top.
Let me fly like my dreams,
Till the bottom of the drop.